But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Randomize
