i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
