I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Congratulations! We have a period
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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