ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
