Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize