Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant