he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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