talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Are my feet made of real feet?
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Randomize
