She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
