Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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