there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
