Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
