I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
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