Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
