You really coming over, don't trick.
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize