i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
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