Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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