we're blogging at a bar
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
