Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Randomize
