What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
We're too hungover to prance.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Randomize
