so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
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