so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
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