Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Randomize
