Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I just pynch a tree in the face
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Randomize
