Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
