We won't sleep together?
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Dick very happy bro
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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