hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
3pm strippers are depressing
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Everclear isn't food dammit
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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