But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
