I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
