nut hugger
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Randomize
