He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
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