Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Randomize
