in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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