Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize