I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
well most of my day revolves around power hour
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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