im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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