I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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