If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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