Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
