There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Randomize
