so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
