I don't remember. Are we still dating?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
