Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize