Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
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i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
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I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
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