I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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