I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
