Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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