Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  life is too short to starve

  (678): View more from Georgia

  life is also too short to be fat

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (336): life is too short to starve (678): life is also too short to be fat http://tfl.nu/v94u
  Replies (6) Good night (2336) Bad night (1169)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (901): oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass (901): fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings http://tfl.nu/b0u6
  Replies (118) Good night (4349) Bad night (1326)
• Favorite

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (952): I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband. http://tfl.nu/celm
  Replies (17) Good night (1902) Bad night (3714)
• Favorite

  (606): View more from Kentucky

  I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (606): I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel. http://tfl.nu/sip1
  Replies (41) Good night (3937) Bad night (1180)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (706): Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus. http://tfl.nu/wtrd
  Replies (16) Good night (901) Bad night (3538)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist http://tfl.nu/ubmz
  Replies (12) Good night (1388) Bad night (5305)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole. http://tfl.nu/jzio
  Replies (11) Good night (846) Bad night (2981)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (618): Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all http://tfl.nu/t0uz
  Replies (11) Good night (3119) Bad night (745)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings. http://tfl.nu/mygm
  Replies (6) Good night (1638) Bad night (670)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again. http://tfl.nu/8i97
  Replies (4) Good night (1768) Bad night (501)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (267): The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them. http://tfl.nu/ubes
  Replies (3) Good night (1262) Bad night (1050)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him. http://tfl.nu/2jpe
  Replies (5) Good night (1196) Bad night (488)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again http://tfl.nu/nar2
  Replies (5) Good night (724) Bad night (323)
• Favorite

  (857): View more from Massachusetts

  Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (857): Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much. http://tfl.nu/89i4
  Replies (0) Good night (755) Bad night (294)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism? http://tfl.nu/3od1
  Replies (3) Good night (774) Bad night (236)

Randomize