I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Randomize
