if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I understand Curling. That high.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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