marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize